Jaws

You would think by now that the surgeries would be over. That this would be all behind me. Of course it’s not. Last Thursday was anxiety inducing. Jaw surgery is not something to take lightly. It’s not as simple as pulling a tooth. The amount of trauma my mouth has had in the past 2 years is pretty bad. 

X-rays and CT kept showing this strange “tooth root” in the jawbone. It’s exactly where one of the implants were placed. When the implants were placed, this spot was always irritating. It didn’t feel right. Man. The guy that did the implants was a complete failure. This guy fucked up everything possible. I’m pretty sure the bone grafts he placed weren’t done right either. Comparing between what he did and what my oral surgeon does, 2 completely different outcomes. I’m not sure at this point what that spot is. Or what it was. Needless to say it fucking hurt. I couldn’t even use my dentures. The minute I would bite down I would just immediately take them out. 

At the same time, my mouth has never been the same. I’m pretty sure this all ties back to when I squeezed out the pus. My cheeks are also still swollen. They feel, like insulation. Not smooth. Lumpy. Fibrous. I don’t know if it’s inflammation or something else at this point. All I know is that it doesn’t feel right. The front of my jaw has also been swelling. It’s hard to explain. Again, all I know is it doesn’t feel normal. 

2 weeks after the surgery and things are still .. shit. The surgery itself sucked. Thank god I got put out for it. I don’t even want to attempt to remember what happened. All I remember is waking up to take Valium an hour before surgery. Yeah. The anxiety hit that high note. Surgery for me has become absolute dreadful stress. Anyone who has had surgery knows exactly what I’m talking about. Wife got me there at 7:20a, was in the chair by 7:30a, out cold pretty quick. My oral surgeon is just great. 

I don’t remember going home. I don’t remember any of it. Apparently before we left they forgot to remove my IV. I made the joke of just leave it in so I could just do my own drugs. God I’m stupid lol. Although it would be nice. Hell ensued as the fentanyl wore off. The lump under my tongue started to grow. My face started to hurt. This is why the anxiety happens. I’ve seen this fallout way too many times. It sucks. Felt every minute of it. Thankfully he prescribed me dilaudid. Jesus that shit just works. It curved most of the breakthrough pain while the morphine Jay’s handled the broad problems. 

The next day after surgery Jesus the swelling got bad. Yeah. By day 3 I looked like I had swallowed a bee. I made the decision to break into my dexamethasone stash that my go gave me. 4mg. Yeah it’s a lot. But you know what. It works. It helps. I don’t know why doctors are so against it. Yes.  Steroids are a double standard. Lowers your immune system to curb swelling, inflammation and pain. Downside is you are asking for infection. Guess what?  My immune system sucks anyways with or without steroids. So I honestly don’t give a fuck. The immuglobulin fixes that anyway every week. So it’s not like I’m going to tank, or bottom out. 

I didn’t take any work off for this either. I warned my boss that this could potentially take me out for a week, but I managed to put the time in each fay, I just started late the same day as surgery. It saves me sick time. Which is really what I need right now. Stockpiling days off. For the amount of shit that I’ve gone through, I know that there are scarier days coming. 

As the next week rolled around, as did a new appointment with a new ent. Went ok. He listened. Got him to understand the mouth thing. Maybe he will help.  He seemed game. So I’m going to give Hepworth 1 more shot at trying to fix this shit in my cheeks and chin. The constant pain. The cysts I constantly gum to death wishing I had actually teeth. I would just take them out myself at that point.  My dermo has been amazing. He’s just allowing me to bring in cultures from home. 4 days later. Yup. You guessed it. That coagulate negative staph is back. Shit is just annoying. Every doctor just keeps saying “oh it’s nothing”. Dude do you know hear what the fuck I am telling you?  What I feel every days doesn’t not even remotely pale in comparison to to what they think this is. My face crawls from the pain. I’m having to eat morphine every day. 

Necessary evil. As I discussed this with my immunologist I got angry. Why is is so easy to get iv antibiotics with you, but next to impossible with him. You really need to talk to infectious disease. And he did. My immunologist is relentless. Yeah. He did this with the other group, but those guys were dumb. Dr. Terra on the other hand is understanding that yes. There’s is an infection in my face. This is the 4th time I’ve pulled coagulate negative staph out. Antibiotics are not working. Please consider the biggest guns. For once he agreed. I told him I will keep culturing to find what this is. Yes. I’ve got four positive labs. 2 nights ago a huge white chunk came out of my sinuses. Cultured.  Fuck it. I’ve only got 4 sticks left that expire in October. I don’t give a flying fuck at this point. 

It’s too soon to tell anything yet, but I stopped the clindamycin, and started Tetracycline alone with the cefdinir, with 4mg of dexamethasone daily. And it’s working. The strange swelling in my cheeks and chin are slowly going away. The lump under my tongue is shrinking as well as the cysts that I keep feeling are also shrinking. 

I am hopeful that this the sign of the times that maybe, just maybe John will get a break from all this. 

On the legal front, the adjuster has all the documents, evidence, and personal impact statement. Here’s hoping I get a number soon. 

This has been a very long hard road that could have been avoided had he just listened to me  if only I was more vocal and first back then, the damage wouldn’t have been so bad.