I’ll start off with saying I still feel like shit. That may come as no surprise, but it’s what it feels like. Over the past week, my face has been hurting more and more. Between my jaw and my face, I just feel swollen. Mornings are becoming much harder to shake the pain and nausea I’m welcomed to every time I get up.
Maybe I’m at the point of no return, where this will never get better. I messaged the new Dr. Today, but his response was vague as usual. He wants me to stop everything.
Since I started the herbal supplements, I can’t really say for certain if I’ve gotten any better. It just seems like I’m stuck in an infinite loop of bullshit with all doctors. I even went back to see Dr. Courtney who really didn’t seem too interested in what I had found with the Lyme stuff.
Maybe this is how my life is going to be from here on out. Just wake up every day feeling like shit. Having to push through the day just knowing tomorrow isn’t going to get any better.
I 100% know that there is an infection in my face, however, nobody, and I mean NOBODY wants to help. Or try to help. I just get non-answers. Yet I manifest physical symptoms. There are literally 2 large globs of crap in my cheeks. I scrape this white shit out of the inside of my mouth. Constantly. The lumps of shit under my tongue have become unbearable. It just fucking hurts. I wish I could just suck really hard to pull this shit out, but that aint gonna happen. I’m pretty sure that whatever bone graft material Dr. Dipshit used is playing into all of this.
The swelling that you can see in the front just screams something is wrong. It’s almost like it’s coming from there and spreading through my face and cheeks. When I run my finger through the bottom of the outside of my jaw, it’s just lumpy. The most disgusting part, is I can move some of it around. I just don’t see how an MRI or a CT doesn’t pick whatever this is up.
Today when I woke up, my throat and neck hurt. The lumps in my neck are getting more painful. The back of my throat feels like there’s something stuck there. Between my eyes it just burns. This morning when I hit the shower, I just gagged and coughed for a solid 2 minutes. When I blew out my nose, more white shit came out. Then I just started gagging.
Every day that passes is just getting worse. I am almost convinced they are doing this to just keep me sick.
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