Sepsis Watch

Last night was probably the worst night I’ve had in a very very long time. By the time my watch was annoying me to go to bed, I was already fighting these strange spasms. In my neck, shoulders, chest and lungs.

Unusual to say the least.

This is already in addition what what I’ve already been feeling. Severe exhaustion. My heat finally decided to jump into the game last night. First time I’ve seen it go above 120bpm since the surgery. With what’s going on in my face, sinuses, and jaw, I can only conclude that this is either more fallout from the mold detox, remember, I’ve given it 2 things to worry about now. The mold itself, and the toxins it’s releasing throughout my body.

The sweating has returned too. The typical night mode process, is take all my medication by 8:30pm, then lay on the couch on the heating pad for my shoulders and upper back. Heat helps. So as I passed out last night, Aggie began to rub my back. This is an immediate way to just make my shut off. “Sun’ getting really low”. It doesn’t take much. And I was out cold.

By 12:45am, I woke up to pain. Everywhere. So I did the usual, hit the bathroom, take a dilaudid and go back to sleep. I was hoping that this was going to be the night that I just slept through.

Holy shit I was so wrong

It started around 1:45am. I awoke to every muscle in my body just constricting as hard as they could. It was like 1 big non-stop Charley horse. Everywhere. But it didn’t stop there. As I lunged in agony out of bed, I immediately hit the floor. My legs were not having any of this.

As I tried to gather myself from the floor, I managed to get in prayer position, but I was just screaming into the pillow. That’s when I noticed that my neck was completely locked up. I couldn’t move it. As I screamed into the pillow (wishing I could bite at this point), my lungs felt like I breathed in napalm and the fire was lit. As I got to my feet, I immediately went into a full on cold sweat. Felt like every sweat gland opened up, I was soaked. Every breath I took, it hurt more and more. I’ve had this before. It’s pleurisy. It’s the water sack around your lungs. It’s what allows your lungs to expand and rub across your ribs.

I started to shallow breathe. Almost like lamas. I left the bedroom because I didn’t want to wake up Aggie. She needs her sleep. I writhed in agony until 2:45am. My chest felt like an elephant was sitting on it. Every breath I took hurt. I aimlessly made my way to my sling bag. There’s a reason I have it. Every rescue medication is there. I found my albutetol inhaler and took 2 hits. The minute it hit my lungs, nothing. I started to panic.

Fucking great. This is not going great. As I stood up against the patio door, the cold was so helpful. It shut off the fire. I cracked the door and took periodic cold breaths from the outside. Hailing back to the asthma days, it was open the freezer and stick head inside.

The spams stopped around 3am. I felt so exhausted. Nothing like running a marathon on demand. I ran ecg’s. Heart was definitely freaking out. I went to the bathroom and grabbed the towel. I wiped off all the sweat I generated.

I then noticed that I now have a fever. Great. Now what.

I went back to bed. And just laid out on my side of the bed. At this point, all the cats were awake. I laid in bed for 30 minutes. Hoping that was it.

It wasn’t.

3:50am came, and I went through round 2. Same thing. This time I panicked. I woke up Aggie. Tried to explain to her between the shallow breathing. What’s going on. Symptom by symptom. I fought this “attack” again until 5:45am. It let up. Out of nowhere. At this point I’m on the couch. I need to sleep. I need to go to Naylor at 10:30am. I need to badge into work. I took a Valium to just get everything to calm down. Muscles, and mind. I need an off button at this point.

Aggie woke me up at 7am. I was so scared that the attack would come back. I sat on the couch just self evaluating myself. By 8, I got up. But the chest pressure was there. I could feel it. Just like in alien. Aggie handed me a cup of coffee (she’s just fucking amazing) as I stumbled into the kitchen. I felt so sore. So tired. I knew that this wasn’t the end of it.

I got my work laptop out. And told the group I had a Dr appointment. And I’ll come to the office after. I needed to buy time. As Aggie left at 8:15am, by 8:30am WHAM

Fuck here we go again. Same symptoms. I barely swallowed all my morning meds. I held anything supplement. Maybe I’ve pushed the mold detox too far. Maybe my body needs a break.

I took dilaudid, and voriconazole. And just tried to calm down my body. Eventually it calmed down. As it calmed down I jumped in the shower. I gotta get ready. I can’t be late. To the appointment or the office.

As I got out of the shower, the pain in my chest was just there. Reminding me that this could come back at any second. I gathered my things. Remote started the Jeep twice, and slowly moved my way out of the apartment. And down 3 very long flights of stairs. It must have taken me 10 minutes to get all the way down.

I told myself, “just move at a slow pace”. This isn’t a race. The fever really started to hit me hard. Everything hurt. It took everything I had to get in the Jeep. And drive. All I need is this to happen while driving. I kept it slow. I stuck to the right lane in the event something happened.

I got to the appointment 10 minutes early. I just took my time. I didn’t care. This is the speed I can move at. The appointment went well with Naylor.

He agreed to my Root Cause Analysis. And the supporting data. I told him I have 2 concerns. Mold and Lyme. #1/2.

He agreed. He thinks the Lyme is starting to make its way back. We never fully treated it. The Mastoidectomy took priority. I explained what infectious disease did.

He said that I need to go back on my Lyme detox. And include mold. Added azithromycin, and sent me on my way. He did say that if infectious disease doesn’t want to play nice about the mold, that he would back me up. Little does he know I have a secret month of it. But the first dose, the one I had to pay out of pocket for, I’ve got < 10 pills left.

I need more of it. I need to be on this at least 3 months. It’s working. But again that logic doesn’t work with infectious disease. They still don’t take my CVID into account.

As I got to work, I took my sweet time getting to my desk. Co-workers noticed me. Immediately came over and asked if I need help. I fought back the tears at this point. I’m just keeping it together. I’m satisfying HR’s requirement that I badge in 3x a week. No matter if I’m sick or not. They don’t care. Policy is policy. I’m not going to do anything to jeapordize my job. I need the insurance. Period.

I sat at my desk for 4 hours. I just checked email. Did some PC maintenance. Walked up to one of the managers and told him my fever is out of control. I’m burning up at this point.

I gathered my shit and went home. I’m gonna WFH tomorrow 100%. Gonna play by the rules. Plus I don’t want to get anyone sick.

So I’m now on sepsis watch for the rest of the day. Once my fever exceeds 103F (currently 101.9), I’m going in. Why am I waiting? Because I need to check all the sepsis symptom checkboxes. It allows the ER to give me what I need. And want.

It’s stupid I have to do this but you gotta learn to play the game. At this point, I’m a pro.