Controlling Inflammation

Yesterday was terrible. Between the pressure drops, and the overall inflammation in my face and mouth, I don’t know what’s worse.

People often ask me “Hey what are you doing this weekend?” My atypical reply is “nothing”.

The only thing I do on the weekends is try to sleep as much as possible. Rest. Chronic pain is an affliction I don’t want anyone to experience. Last nights ketamine was much needed.

It’s one of the things that actually helps keep the inflammation in check. Last nights session was different. I’m not sure if it was due to the pressure dropping like crazy, as I got out of the car I turned to Anies and told her that “tonight is going to be different”.

It was definitely not the typical session. Usually it’s get checked in, sit in a room, and within 5 minutes it’s underway. I sat for almost 45 minutes waiting to get started. They must’ve been really behind. The pain I was feeling as I waited was unreal. Hitting me from all sides. The chaos that creates is unbearable. Around 6:50, they finally came in and got me started. The ketamine hit hard, and fast.

Usually it takes about 10 minutes to hit, but last night, it took awhile. Much longer than usual. As the second shot arrived I was still “there”. Which normally by the second shot, I’m already 3rd person / disassociated. After the second shot, same thing. I didn’t really go where I usually go. It was just a strange experience. Not the typical “disappear” for an hour. It felt like I was 1/2 way there. As I sat in the chair, calm came over me. Which normally happens after, this was during.

So a slight difference to my experience, but yielded the same result. “Coming back” pain free. Not feeling 1 square inch of my face that I’m usually accustomed to feeling. The primary place I feel it the most is in the front of my jaw and cheeks. The pain itself is hard to describe. It burns, it peaks, it shifts to my left ear, and back again. Over and over. The intensity varies. All I know is that what I experience isn’t normal. It’s like getting stung by a 1000 bees and snapped constantly with rubber bands. It’s as almost as if I dipped my face in lava.

The difference this morning is 180 degree. I don’t feel ANYTHING in my face. As I woke up, I expected the pain to be there as I awoke. I’m used to that expectation every morning, but it wasn’t there. The ketamine does an amazing job resetting the pain I experience. Dilaudid just delays it and lowers the peaks, Ketamine wipes it out. Just, gone.

I often reply to a few people after therapy that I’m home and pain free. A common thing I say is “I wish this was everyday”. People take things for granted until it affects them directly. Everyone has their everyday struggle, this is mine.

Keeping the inflammation in check is now my primary focus. Unfortunately I ran out of Posaconazole Friday. As I took the last 3 pills I had, I started to look in my “stash” for the itraconazole. Found it. A bottle of about 30 pills, which essentially will last me 7 days. 100mg per pill, 200mg every 12 hours. I also had a bottle of liquid itraconazole, so that will be used last. The bioavailability of liquid vs pill is much better. Hopefully Hepworth can be in-network soon.

Controlling the inflammation from what I would have to guess, is the Candida that’s in my face. Hepworth always sees a fungal infection in my sinuses everytime he scopes my sinuses. Early 2021, I was “lucky” enough to culture it from one of the several cysts that form in my face and neck. So I know it’s “there”. Slowly consuming my face, and my patience.

So what have I changed? A big part of cadidasis is taking away the “food” the fungus has. Its primary source of food, is sugar. I’ve severely reduced the amount of sugar I consume each day. Just like the sodium for my heart, keeping both of those in check has become a real challenge since both sodium and sugar is in everything. And I do mean everything.

Every day I used to blindly just drink whatever. Whether it be a white chocolate mocha from Starbucks, or Dr Pepper, or my favorite, Mexican Coke. Unfortunately from a food perspective, white rice breaks down to sugar. A lot of the things you eat/consume breaks down to some form of it. That’s the hardest thing throughout this entire change to my diet. What can have (in moderation), what I can have freely, and what I basically have to avoid.

Daily I used to stop into Starbucks. It was just a routine thing I’ve always done for years. Go grab a coffee before work. Little did I know it was LOADED with the thing that’s probably driving the underlying problem. Between the candida, the inflammation it’s creating, avoiding sugar, it’s not easy to do. By any means. Breaking “habits” are one of the hardest things to do.

So I have to starve myself and my body of the food the candida feeds off of to try and get the inflammation under control. From the ketamine last night bulldozing over the pain, and resetting my brain from the lasting effects that pain causes, and trying to reduce as much sugar intake as possible, it’s realistically the only way I’m going to get ahead of this.

Unfortunately ketamine for now, is a necessary evil, but realistically since the Mastoidectomy in 2023, it’s been instrumental in balancing the pain I experience. I would much rather micro-dose ketamine, than continue to eat opiates. Opiates have been another necessary evil that really isn’t a fun option with the side effects that come. My body is so used to them by now, I don’t really experience side effects from them, just the benefits of a lower amount of pain. Ketamine definitely does a much better job of STOPPING the pain, when opiates just delay it.

Finding the right balance here is key. I know the ketamine is beneficial in many ways. I’m glad I was introduced to it during my stay at Swedish post Mastoidectomy #2 in 2023, I don’t think I’d be where I am today without it. Plus also leaving the toxic environment that Parc was creating. That’s been the biggest positive change in all of this. Unfortunately, it was the most costly, as our rent went up by $500. As I told Anies however, it’s something we have to do because that place was effecting all of us in different ways, I was just the recipient of the worst of it.

I can tell you that the widowmaker was something I didn’t expect to happen. It really came out of left field. But since then, the silver lining was that’s what triggered my focus on the right things. Yes, 3 weeks before it, a huge fungal abscess was removed from my frontal sinus, but that kicked off the environmental testing that ultimately showed home was the culprit in my “phantom” illness. As well as the afflictions everyone else was experiencing. Unfortunately, the cats can’t tell you when they are sick, or when they are hurting. But their behavior has changed exponentially since we left, as well as Anies’ “asthma” is gone, and her hair has stopped falling out.

The financial impacts of all of this has really taken its toll however. Things have gotten extremely tight. But that’s due to the debt we already incurred up until we were forced to move, but now it’s roughly $800 more a month to “live” due to where we live now, plus needing Ketamine to get through this whole ordeal. I was making progress in slowly chipping away at the gargantuan mountain of debt, but now it feels like I can’t get rid of it fast enough.

The GoFundMe has been extremely helpful with helping me reduce the balance of the overall amount of debt I’m trying to get rid of. Every donation I’ve received has 100% gone towards reducing the amount owed. With it, I’ve managed to kill off 2 cards. I just have 3 left, plus all the personal loans I’ve taken out trying to consolidate the medical debt. If I can just financially survive until next July, that’s when the first medical consolidation loan is done. This debt started in 2017, and went until 2019. That $700 a month would definitely offset the amount of $ we are paying now, but it’s not attached to some form of interest that’s ridiculous.

Again, any donation helps me survive this. I really do appreciate it as anything helps, and I do mean anything. The minute the money hits my account, it immediately goes towards the next debt target. You can find links below to help me get out of this financial nightmare that wasn’t caused by me that’s for sure.

That’s all for now.